Therapy

Damn, it felt good to put this together. Thanks for the feedback about the black text on blue background, friends... I've re-worked it.

The wild and woolly eating habits of some web 2.0 denizens

This morning I walked into the kitchen and you'd have thought Satan herself went in there and farted - really it was just a co-worker mashing up a nice bowl of hard-boiled egg mush. This could well be a childhood portrait of the same person, the look in her eyes is vaguely similar to when she's slaughtering a celery.

Uncle 'Cid visits some mice

There are days that I want to be one of those mice. I also wonder if those are the same mice in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Food for thought on a Monday.

Passive-aggressive, in Colombian slang

"Mosquita muerta" (literally dead fly) - implying that the passive-aggressive person has a sort of forcefield around them that kills bugs.

Bear with me, I'm leading up to something.

Work related? Hell no.

I thought I saw...

the earliest arrival at the party this weekend screwing his girlfriend in the pool. Quite another thing to mention it to the host - and he asked the guy.

So it was confirmed. And because the host has a scientific background the confirmation came with speculation about what it might have done to the pH of the water.

The confirmation was enough for me. Gotta tick the "don't give a shit" box about the pH.

Will they use a circular antenna so the wind blows through it?

From the Honolulu Star-Bulletin

K-WHAT? Unbuilt Maui TV station lands questionable call letters
byline: Erika Engle

THE call letters KUNT have landed at a yet-unbuilt low-power digital television station in Wailuku, Maui.
Alarmingly similar to a word the dictionary says is obscene, the call letters were among a 15-page list of new call letters issued by the Federal Communications Commission and released this week.

The same station owner also received KWTF for a station in Arizona.

From Skokie, Ill., comes a sincere apology "to anyone that was offended," said Kevin Bae, vice president of KM Communications Inc., who requested and received KUNT and KWTF. It is "extremely embarrassing for me and my company and we will file to change those call letters immediately."

He thanked your columnist for bringing the matter to his attention and pledged to, "make sure I don't fall asleep on the job when selecting call signs again."

One might understand how Bae's eyes could glaze over during selection, as KM has some 80 sets of call letters and alpha-numeric callsigns for TV and radio stations in several states.

No KM station is yet on the air in Hawaii but its mainland TV stations carry programming from America One Network, My Network TV and the CW.

The call letter snafu was a source of great mirth for Bae's attorney.

"I can't tell you how long he laughed at me when he learned of my gaffe," Bae said.

Broadcasters for generations have joked among themselves about call letters resembling off-color words or acronyms knowing the FCC would never approve their assignment -- but that was before computerization.

KCUF-FM near Aspen, Colo. got its F-word-in-reverse call letters in August of 2005 and has been on the air since December, "Keeping Colorado Uniquely Free," its Web site says. Uh, yeah.

Station officials could not be reached, but the automated pop-music slinger has been written about twice in the Aspen Daily News. The paper said radio regulators "blessed the call letters."

However, assignment of call letters actually is an automated process, according to Mary Diamond of the FCC's Office of Media Relations. Broadcasters use the FCC Web site to request and receive call letters with no oversight from Beavis, his partner, or any FCC regulator.

Dude, seriously. Even after years of concerns over broadcast indecency and the debate about fines for fleeting profanities that hit the air.

The Code of Federal Regulations allows applicants to request call letters of their choice as long as the combination is available. Further, "objections to the assignment of requested call signs will not be entertained at the FCC," it states.

Un-pausing my career

For the last seven months I've worked for a web two-dot-oh company.

Today I gave my notice. It was an easy decision to make comparing the situation I'm moving into vs. where I'm at now. A lot more is known about the culture and co-workers where I'm going - especially people I'll be immediately working with. The last seven months have been a nightmare in that regard.

Actually the whole immediate team I work with are great people - if you leave out the sociopath otaku and the crackhead.

On to bigger and better things. More will get posted here when the dust settles.

She's actually 27 today...

A web 2.0'er turns "40"

When does a quarter begin and end?

It has nothing to do with an empty baggie. Read on.

Let's see. It's a fiscal year=calendar year type of company. Today during a meeting Tupac asked that question, it was great.

We told him it varied, like easter.

Visit to Tahnee in San Diego

Damn, we had a good time. She escaped from 2.0-land to go work in her actual line of work.

It just so happened that that weekend was gay pride. We went to the parade with Shaggy and the dog loved all the attention. The parade was fun too. I have video of most of the parade but its been a very busy week - not enough time/energy to edit it.

We went to Tijuana after the parade - but much of what goes on in Mexico must stay there.

So we tried to go out dancing but all the bars had changed themes for the weekend. Back in the US naturally. And walking down the street I had a really weird experience. This group of young-ish (under 25) gay guys walking towards us. One of them looks at us and says "Happy Pride, breeders!"

I was (only temporarily) speechless.

I looked at the guy and said "Hey, you're cute."

His response was a surprised-sounding, "Oh, you're gay?!"

Well I'm glad we got that clear. It solves a lot of mysteries about my life, like why I've never slept with women. It blew my frickin' mind...

Religion in 50 pages or less for the faithful in a hurry

It might be short enough (don't know about small words tho) for president bush to read without help.

At 109F / 43C, even safety cones get E.D.

The Qwest (phone) truck was on the street near where I live in Arizona. It's very hot today. Look at the safety cones that their lawyers make them put at the front and back of the truck to protect the worker who's nowhere near it.

For those who aren't exposed to the barrage of US pharmaceuticals advertising E.D. is the term for pills like V**gr@ etc. I don't want to say what E.D. stands for because I'm scared of what it'll do to the ads on here.

E.D. is the male version of, "Mom, do you ever get that not-so-fresh feeling?"

This was enclosed in a friend's bank statement...

Well, almost. But that's really what they're selling - isn't it?

Can YOU decipher this? I can't

Qwest sent me the following inscrutable e-mail:
Arizona On Line CPNI Opt-in Confirmation

Qwest is sending you this e-mail in order to comply with an Arizona
Customer Proprietary Network Information (CPNI) rule that requires a
confirming communication be sent to customers who allow Qwest to use
CPNI. Recently, while setting up or accessing your Qwest online
MyAccount profile, you agreed that Qwest and its affiliate companies
could use CPNI in connection with Qwest online offerings of products and
services. We appreciate your decision. This will help us tailor
offerings to you as new products and services become available that
might meet your personal or business needs or save you money.

You may change your decision anytime by using the Update Profile link in
your MyAccount or call us at 1-866-431-4133.

Copyright © 2007 Qwest. All Rights Reserved.

CCTV9 reports "Starbucks moves out of the forbidden city"

At 4:45 AM the dog had to heed nature's call and I happened to flip through the channels and catch a CCTV9 talk show about Starbucks moving out of the forbidden city.

They are talking about having a large number of souvenirs available now and debating whether that's a good thing - well, cheap Chinese-made souvenirs won't have far to travel to this tourist spot.... Funny they didn't make that point ;)

CCTV9 is a really interesting propaganda mouthpiece for the Chinese government. At times it's even more "fair and balanced" ;) than Faux News.

Well, they speak good English but I smirk a little bit every time one of the commentators says "cultural anxiety." All those l's and r's in one word can't be so good.

Web 2.0, not only good for social media but frozen food

It frosted me a little bit this morning that there was ice on the top of my diet coke. And it also occurred to me - that girl who's always eating esoteric things like
* a stick of butter
* celery with hummus
* molasses with hard boiled eggs
* molasses with anything
* an old chocolate easter egg because Easter was during a fad diet that prohibited it
* microwaved hard-boiled eggs that leave a RANK sulfurous odor that makes it smell like SATAN visited our kitchen

I hope it didn't freeze any of her five meals for today.

barbie-san @ Web 2.0

My cellphone camera's resolution ain't that great but Barbie-san came to visit us today. Who knew that behind the gruff exterior exists a doll aficionado? ;)

A comment was "Each one of those received reduces his chance of ever having a girlfriend." I didn't say that though. Honest.

Cronica: Argentina legalizes LP gas for vehicle use, had been in use anyway for years

It's long been a common modification to take a LP gas tank and mount it in the car trunk. Taxis all over BsAs have this modification, although its heretofore been illegal to use LP gas intended for heating or cooking as a fuel. Its a tax issue as much as it is a safety issue.

It also makes every Taxi, regardless of the make and model - is every bit as safe as the infamous ford Pinto. A rear end collision could result in a damn big explosion.

So far the Argentine government is establishing legal distribution of LP gas through gas stations but the article says nothing about implementation of safety standards for the tanks.

The legal distribution makes it slightly easier to get - and more importantly possible to tax. Previously all one had to do was phone for gas delivery for the home and then shlep the canister out to the car trunk while no one was watching. It's a positive move though. LP gas burns more cleanly that gasoline or diesel.

Whether Uruguay will follow through and make LP legally available for the thousands of LP powered cars already on the roads remains to be seen.

Crunchy critters, seen with my own eyes

I was out with a group of friends on Saturday night at a place in North Central Phoenix. It's an interesting group and someone happened to have brought a friend with who was unquestionably mentally ill. When he gets the undivided attention of everyone in the area by taking his shirt off, throwing it on the ground and speaking in tongues - obviously he ain't quite right.

He was muttering something about being a trillionaire but he just had to get the money back from the cops.

The random observations were interrupted by the arrival of a large bug. I don't know what they are called but they look like an elongated cockroach and they fly. If one hits your windshield you get a big greenish yellow spot where the bug explodes. One of the girls got up and screamed, someone else managed to step on it.

The trillionare immediately made a beeline for the dead bug - it was like a hungry kid in a Mad Max movie. He ate it in two bites. The group scattered for the evening shortly thereafter.

The TrunkMonkey alarm system - more effective than a loud alarm

Web 2.0 about to be borg'd

Well it appears that my job will get a little more interesting. It appears that some rather sweeping organizational changes will cause our trusty little birkenstocks 'n kasha Samba ersatz "domain controller" system to eventually be overrun by market forces, namely Active Directory. The technologically elegant loses out to the (perceived) economically expedient.

It's a sad tale, like Beta vs. VHS. But hey, I've spent years of my life on Active Directory. And at the end of the day I go home and it has no effect on my life whatsoever - i.e. "shrug," he said.

The above first paragraph has no value in being translated into anything non-technical. If you don't understand it skip it and go on to the next post.

Want some *ssy?

No, I'm not writing about my dog. (She understands those words as "Let's go outside.")

It seems that the co-chairman of Senator John McCain's Florida campaign was arrested for soliciting a sex act.

Yes, Florida state Representative Bob Allen is facing charges for solicitation of prostitution - in a Titusville, FL city park that "...he helped build." Ergo, he would know where to look then, right? This statement probably won't be a feature of his legal defense.

According to CNN, he offered an undercover officer $20 for an unspecified act. Now at U.S. prices the most likely "act" was a blowjob and probably copping a feel - the price is a little low for any other services.

This is an area where undocumented Mexican immigrants almost definitely have not put downward pressure on wages, as they tend to be very Catholic.

There's an AP photo of Rep. Allen leaving the Brevard County Jail after his arrest. His heavy five o' clock shadow likely rules out cunnilingus as the unspecified act - you'd think that would raise the price beyond $20.00 because with that sandpaper it'd put her out of commission for an evening. And you can definitely see why he'd be paying for it. Not great to look at, this fellow.

He stated that "This is an ugly and unpleasant situation that has been thrust upon me..." - and to think a few hours before his mental picture had included him doing the thrusting.

The McCain campaign has not commented. They'd issued a press release in March saying, "Allen will serve as a House co-chair for Sen. McCain's campaign." Perhaps its a chair that includes a face to sit on?

In Uruguay prostitution is legal (but medically regulated - they've just not found a practical way to tax it) and this would be a non-scandal because the arrest just never would have happened. Every day I saw the same prostitute as I turned off of the dirt road onto the highway and we would exchange friendly waves. Of course if she was negotiating an important business deal with a (usually) Brazilian truck driver I wouldn't wave.

That twenty bucks would have gone a lot further there.

Maybe his legal defense could be that he was creating a job?

Yet another frequent customer number...

Well in the last month, Albertson's stopped their data mining (er, frequent customer) program. For those readers outside the USA, it's a supermarket.

Frequent customer numbers and crappy little barcodes are not unique to the USA by any stretch of the imagination. In Uruguay I had my Tienda Inglesa, Devoto and Disco cards for their various point systems (powered by IBM) for little crappy prizes. (All are major supermarket chains.) Their cards didn't get you discounts (probably a legal thing) but you could in theory earn enough points to get actual merchandise - if you fed a family of eight for ten years or something.

It was with no sorrow that I took that little plastic Albertson's barcode off my key chain. They hadn't engineered it very well and the barcode number had worn off rendering it unreadable. The poor cashiers had to hand key it, not that I used them very much.

You could even enter it yourself at the self-checkout. There were many times (well, a couple) that store employees (when they were around) looked at me in shock as I pressed the little fruit and vegetables icon on the screen and then keyed in the numbers under the bar code. However, there REALLY were many times that there was not an employee in sight so you really have to know the quirks of those vicious non-robotic-appearing robots. If not operated with care those machines violate the first of Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics, namely "A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm."

It's the INACTION part I take issue with. If the computer doesn't know the correct weight of the item or you even fart in the general direction of that innocuous looking carousel of plastic bags, you have to wait for the cashier. Why is this? That bagging area is a scale equally as sensitive as that owned by any coke dealer, just less obvious when you walk in.

Harm might be a stretch - but in 2007 America and especially in Scottsdale to wait is to experience emotional distress. And under some circumstances in the miraculous American legal system emotional distress is absolutely equal to harm.

But I've digressed.

In The Sound of Music the Mother Superior tells Maria (Julie Andrews) "When the lord closes a door, somewhere he opens a window."

It's true. This week with the sudden revocation of my Albertson's card I had a setback in the race to see how many primary keys (<--- database joke for the non techies) I can collect before I die. There is one primary key I'd LOVE to lose but life chose to zap the supermarket one (this week at least).

The balance was restored however. I received a new one though moments ago via email. I appears I now have a Mr. S Leather customer number that I can use to get a discount. Please note that that link is not safe for... work, children, or those who have been "saved." So the upshot of all this is that my cucumber purchases are no longer tracked but my (wouldn't you like to fuckin' know) purchases ARE.

Your international package, delivered by... SATAN?

Note the digits right after LC... Satan herself (probably looks like Laura Bush) is going to deliver your package straight out of a UN helicopter...

Sick to death of the iPhone? This is for you.

We know it will browse the web. We know it comes with a big bill and a long contract with a nasty company that's grown chaotically through acquisition. Those of you who've had to deal with AT&T as a business customer know this firsthand I'm sure.

But this iPhone's end of life is great. Someone had to ask the question... will it blend?

SNOW in BsAs

For the first time in a century, it snowed in BsAs. Pictures are here.

Here is another article about it.

mi mejor amiga conmigo (my best friend with me)

Ale and me, La Jolla bay @ San Diego, CA August 2006

Tupac speaks out - the other 2.0'ers I work with will understand this

This news article got my attention:
KEIZER, Ore. - The City of Keizer is taking heat for installing a group of cement posts designed to protect pedestrians from cars, but which some say is a phallic symbol.

A total of 52 of the posts were installed at a busy intersection in Keizer and they are getting a lot of second glances.

A number of residents have complained to the city that the posts resemble male genitalia.

"I can't disagree with that," said City Manager Chris Eppley. "They certainly did not turn out the way we anticipated."

According to Eppley, the posts were ordered from a catalog and looked much different on paper.

"They're a standard style," Eppley said. "I think in the right context they look fine. They just happened not to (look fine) here."

The city is looking into retrofitting the posts with metal collars and chains that run between them, which they hope will change the look. If not, they said the posts will have to go.

"If that fix doesn't work and I still think they look inappropriate, we'll have wasted $20,000 and we'll have to do something different," Eppley said.

Of course, the city could always keep them up and use them for sex education, at least according to one woman we spoke to. "My son said he wanted to hang a sign on it that says 'always use protection,'" she said.



Anyway, I had to say something but figured that this town might make their comments public record - i.e. something that could wind up in Google with my name. So, for those few of you who work with me, I looked up Tupac's name and external email address and signed his name. Why not.

He ;) said something to the effect of, anyone who's concerned about that looking like a penis needs to get laid.

On local radio....

An ad said "Tanning season is almost here!"

Ok, I'll bite. When the fuck is tanning season in Arizona?

A hit North Korean music video...

Click here to watch.

An Argentine government office - safer than a bank?

A CNN story brought this to my attention. Seems the economy minister, Felisa Miceli, had a bag with USD$64,000 in cash.

Cronica goes into more detail. They say that the plastic bag found in a bathroom closet contained USD$140,000, €50,000 and $100,000 (Argentine Pesos, egual to USD$32,180). They say it happened during a routine sweep of the building looking for explosives.

Miceli's office initially denied it, then a day later said it was money borrowed from her brother to buy an apartment and that the sum of money was really USD$31,670 and ARG$100,000 - which is where CNN/AP gets their figure from.

NOBODY that has lived in Argentina for any length of time would hide that amount of money in a closet. She's being investigated for corruption.

It's remotely possible that the foriegn cash, in the unlikely event it was legitimately obtained, was being kept out of an Argentine bank because many of them will allow you to deposit as much foriegn currency as you want but then restrict withdrawals. Either that or the whole move was being done in cash to evade taxes on the sale, which is about equally as likely as corruption in my mind.

Beating the gabachos over the head with the truth

The word gabacho vaguely translates as "honky." It's what Mexicans in the US say to refer to Americans who they don't respect quite so much.

Check out this link to ¡Ask a Mexican!™

It's a compendium of questions a Mexican journalist gets from readers, could be about anything. Great writing!

Waking an advance-free fraudster

I got an email from "Veronica Blunt" with "Kia Motors UK" telling me I'd won half a million pounds.

Hmm... Kia Motors UK is not likely to have a reply-to address of @yahoo.co.uk. Gee, let me guess the next step - I have to wire them a fee to "release" the prize. Nah, skip that crap...

I phoned the number in the email naturally - at midnight US time. Oops, I woke 'em up.

And you're worried about terrorism on your local subway?

The Subte in Buenos Aires is in a little bit of disrepair. The Subte is BsAs' very large subway system. The point of sharing this is not to rip on BsAs but to point out that there are dangers other than bombs or nerve gas.

The link is to a blog created by a group of subway buffs. In all fairness I have no idea whether the scope of the problems is normal for a system of the size and scale of that in Buenos Aires. The statistics are vague and a little sensationalized - it's what reminded me of Cronica (see the next entry). I've personally ridden it a few times unharmed and to walk through its underground passages on the way to and from the train is just like being in Paris. But its interesting reading that probably isn't going to get translated into English. It's not an exhaustive translation of the whole posting, just some of the bullet points.

For those that don't read Spanish:
* 303 cars with too many kilometers on them
* Many of the wheels have flat spots. The cars have 6 places where they can brake and a 7th emergency brake. The airbrake system malfunctions and causes friction. Also, the brake shoes are not properly fit or in some cases replaced. When they are replaced, its with a material that does not meet the factory specification.
* The rails are not properly aligned on line D between Pueyrredón and Catedral - the busiest route on the whole network
* Some cars don't have safety glass. The glass is like regular window glass and it breaks easily.
* Numerous stations don't have emergency lights. Those that exist are either not in working order or are not correctly placed.
* All of the subway lines have high voltage cables that water has leaked into.
* Some of the platforms are damaged due to problems with the wheels and suspensions of the cars.
* Some of the car frames and axles are bent. Some have rust in the airbrake system.

The lack of safety glass is a little scary - but I'd still like to know some percentages I guess...

I miss Cronica

First of all, Cronica is not something green and sticky in a baggie born from stolen power in a basement.

Did you click the link? If so, you found out it's loud. Cronica is like Argentina's CNN except with a tabloid, national focus.

"Cronica News - the people's news. And now with more stories with all the updates! Stay informed every day with Cronica News!" The voice echoes on with more in the same vein.

Cronica is as subtle as a 65-year-old transvestite who's never touched hormones a day in "her" life. Every half hour there's a loud announcement set to martial music - similar to the one on the web site.

Then its all the chaos that is Argentina. I was chatting with a friend in Uruguay who just spent the weekend with his boyfriend in Buenos Aires. He sent me a couple of links about current events there and it immediately reminded me of Cronica. Everything is sensationalized.

For example, a current story is:
ULTIMO MOMENTO - "Chocaron dos autos en General Paz"
THIS JUST IN - "Two cars crash in General Paz"

Where the f*ck is General Paz? It's a major street in Buenos Aires.

Now, it's likely that they have video to go with that big red headline. If a camera happened to catch the crash, they would show it. If the crash were fatal and people were being flung through windshields to their death, they would STILL show it - probably in slow motion. They'd then interview a cop on the scene and cut to the uncovered bloody corpse(s) on the side of the road while the officer spoke dispassionately about what happened.

Then there would be a series of kidnapings, murders, hostages and sports. And it would start over again on the half hour.

Dirty money paid fast - Libby pays the fine

Bush let him off the hook for the prison sentence and *poof* the huge fine is paid, as if its nothing. Congress should investigate the source of the funds for that cashiers check, bet it leads back to the RNC.

Help cost these evil bastards even more money, donate to Valerie Plame Wilson's civil suit against Bush's cronies. Their site is at www.wilsonsupport.org.

There is more at stake in this Washington scandal than an ugly Jewish girl's virginity and a cum-stained blue dress. The republicans made a huge deal over spilled semen - they should get investigated and made to pay over spilled SECRETS.

Pocky has gone mainstream

Yep, in a Fry's Supermarket in Scottsdale I saw Pocky in the ethnic food area. AWESOME! I can feed my inner otaku at the same time as I buy cereal and juice.

International mail delivered by Satan himself in a U.N. black helicopter?

I went to the post office to day to drop off two international packages. They require customs declarations to be attached.

Both customs declarations had a bar code containing the number 666.

If I was a religious loony I might have run from there...

Lil' Bush - LOVE IT - Catch it on comedy central!

I have a new favorite show. Lil' Bush on Comedy Central. This episode even has a sycophantic Lil' Tony Blair.

This show has Lil' Jeb making the football team - first player not to be required to wear a helmet. Lil' George becomes a cheerleader along with Lil' Tony Blair because they don't make the team.

George Sr. and Barbara are horrified to see that Lil' George is becoming a cheerleader and that he's hanging out with that (wink) British boy. They wouldn't want him to pick up any of those British mannerisms.

The cheerleading esclates to the point where Lil' Tony and Lil' George wind up in actual cheerleader uniforms on the football field and George Sr. barks into his watch "Commece operation tranquilize everyone who saw my son do all that gay shit." The black helicopters descend and soldiers use machine-tranquilizer-guns to knock out everyone.

Then theres a lovely father-son moment where George Sr. tells the story of Barbara - He created her by digging up George Washington's body for the head, William Howard taft for the breasts, and Betsy Ross "for the lady parts." Then he reanimates the body a'la frankenstein.

The previous show features a miniaturized Al-Qaeda!

I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHOW. My PVR is programmed to record every episode.

Pussyhound

My dog is very smart. This afternoon I had a guest over and I realized I had a chance for Shaggy to show what she's learned. I had her do the roll-over-for-a-treat trick (she knew that one when I got her). I had her "bring me your leash" - and she did. It took a few weeks to teach that one but she does it pretty consistently.

The last one I demonstrated truly shocked my guest - but that was the intent all along. I want my dog to be memorable. Shaggy was at the other end of the apartment and I called out, "Shaggy, want some pussy?"

My guest was shocked to see that the dog came RUNNING in response to this.

I explained that just as often as I ask her if she wants to go outside, I ask her the other question so it means the same thing.

But that's my girl. Ask her about pussy and she comes running. I figure since I'm the exact opposite of a pussyhound, there may as well be one in the house.

The American covers his ass after the transaction...

If you read the post below, I did something that would raise Visa's antennae. Card is used in Scottsdale, AZ in the morning - and seven hours later in Montevideo, Uruguay. Better call them so they don't shut it off.

I am asked where I used the card this morning and the amount of the charge. I'm asked a couple of other questions and she said, "You're absolutely right to call us, our system would have flagged this as suspicious." She wanted to know the name of the merchant and the amount in local currency and that was that.

Save yourself the headache and call your bank when you make a sudden foreign transaction. Your card could otherwise be useless the next time you try it.

Uruguay vs. USA - a vast cultural difference

Imagine you call a flower shop out of the blue, you're not a regular customer: and tell them the following. "It's my friend's birthday tomorrow and I want to send her flowers. However, she's at her boyfriend's place and I don't know the address or the phone number there, or his exact name. If I ask her for the address it spoils the surprise. Would you mind calling her cellphone and getting the information to make the delivery?"

In the US the reaction would probably be suspicion. If you were known personally to the employee/owner of the shop AND the recipient was also personally known they'd probably go along with it. But for the average person, unknown on the phone wanting to make that most-potentially-fraudulent transaction -- the one by phone? An unscientific survey I took of friends and relatives all said - no way would that request fly.

Imagine the scenario is real though. It's your good friend's birthday and you need to send something, but those are the facts. Now, her boyfriend's name is Sebastien. In Uruguay this is as common a name as Mike or Mark. You don't know his last name because he's her boyfriend, you've not yet met him or really talked to him. Your friend is sick and staying at her boyfriend's house because its more comfortable there and more importantly she can work from his house since he has ADSL internet access.

So I'm chatting with her on MSN - I'm in Phoenix, she's in Montevideo. The topic of her birthday comes up and I'm thinking how the heck do I get her a gift? I have her exact apartment address. Her office would be easy to find through directories - but a boyfriend on unknown family name with a common first name somewhere in Montevideo? A tough order. I need at least a neighborhood to try to pull this off.

I casually ask, where does he live again?

Pocitos.

Ok, my attention is diverted from the chat and I'm on the phone with Tienda Inglesa in Montevideo making the request in the first paragraph. There was just the tiniest bit of push-back, "But sir, we need an address to do a delivery!" I responded "Yes I understand but if I directly ask her for the address she not only knows shes getting a delivery but who its from. If you ask without mentioning my name, just that there is a paid-for birthday gift to be delivered, the surprise will be better, right?" The lady on the phone agreed. We picked what exactly the gift was going to be. It took awhile, I was having trouble understanding her.

This was not because I have trouble with Spanish - I do well if it's the sole "stream" going through my mind. But I was chatting with my friend the whole time as if I was not on the phone buying her a gift. When I looked back on some of my responses to her written during the call I used spanish words in a lot of cases mixed in with english.

So the lady was very patient and explained again what the options were. I chose one of them. Had I been in Montevideo in a street market the bill would have been 10 or 15 times cheaper but hey, I wasn't there...

"How do you want to pay?"

"Visa"

"Documento tenes?" (Do you have an ID number)

She was a little surprised to hear me reading in American-accented spanish my Uruguayan Cedula number (unusual for a yanqui to have one), and then I gave her my US passport number. (If you live overseas for any length of time you WILL memorize your passport number.)

The card was run and approved, transaction with the store finished.

Back to the chat with my friend.

Your cellphone is going to ring, you better answer it and find out what they want.

She said, "Oh, it is ringing... just a sec"

And the store had made good on its promise to phone and locate the recipient of the gift.

Now THAT is great service.

Web 2.0 boffin CEO buys iPhone must have

The head honcho had a brand new iPhone Monday morning. Big surprise there.

Apparently its ok to leak classified information to the press

Bush just commuted Scooter Libby's prison term. He still has to pay the fine (which is a pittance for him) and do probation (also a joke, much like Bush's military service).

Wonder what other goodies Bush II is going to hand out before the White House door finally bangs him in the ass on the way out?

Speed in Virginia and be nickel and dime'd TO DEATH - possible $3,500 fine for 20 over!!!

This is unbelievable. The USA really is going to wind up like the Roman Empire and tax itself out of existence. Read on...

Quoted from MSN:
Virginia's new $3,550 speeding ticket
Traffic offenders face whopping additional fees that live on long after they've paid their fines. It's part of a growing 'driver responsibility' trend that targets chronic offenders.

Traffic patrols have long been known as roving tax collectors. But in Virginia, they really are collecting taxes.

Starting July 1, an array of traffic offenses, from expired licenses to speeding, come with a "civil remedial fee" attached. That means a motorist convicted of reckless driving (75 mph in a 55 zone would qualify) faces not only a fine of up to $2,500 and a year in jail, but a non-negotiable $350-a-year tax for three years. The law forbids judges from waiving or reducing the fee.

Many fees dwarf the fines. A driver who disobeys an officer's order to pull into a weigh station would be fined $35 and required to pay a $61 court processing fee. But the civil remedial fee would be $900 over three years.

Drunken driving? A fee of $1,000 a year for three years, plus fines and court costs. No insurance? That's $300 a year for three years, plus fines.

It doesn't stop there. Anyone unlucky enough to have 8 points or more on his license (reckless driving is good for 6 by itself) would pay an additional $100, plus $75 for any points over 8, up to $700 a year.

Such "driver responsibility programs" have become increasingly common for two reasons: Many states find that serial offenders make up the bulk of their cases, and they simply need the money. In fact, Virginia added a fee rather than increase fines because it wanted the money to improve its roads, and revenue from fines must go to public schools. The fees are expected to raise $200 million a year.

Not going to lose sleep over Casey Serin...

who's supposedly got to be in court on the 5th of July. You may have heard of him on his site iamfacingforeclosure.com. He's quite deep in debt and a web of contracts, should be interesting to see how it goes. Hopefully court TV will pick it up.

The Rapture - a possible way to escape summer in Arizona?

Yeah right. I believe in the rapture and the end times about as much as I believe Dick Cheney runs an open, honest office.

But I'm watching this show on Discovery Times called The Rapture. Hell, I had time - the guy I was supposed to meet punked out... but that's another story...

They showed a really funny (well the christians took it seriously) website called www.jesuspets.com. Now as I dog owner I read what they had to say with a really open mind - and then laughed like hell.

Here's the proposition:
"What is JesusPets? Who is going to care for your pets after you are raptured into heaven? Many Christians believe that animals do not go to heaven. So when Jesus comes back and you return with him to heaven, will there be somebody to take care of your dog or cat? If you have a non-Christian family member, they might take care of your pet, but if not, have you made any plans? Imagine being taken to streets of gold while your dog starves to death walking around in his own feces trapped in your small house or apartment, subject to fire and earthquakes or even being eaten by heathens searching for any remaining morsel of food. Do you want that to happen? With the imminent collapse of the global economy and rampant godlessness, even the community shelters will not have the resources to care for your poor, hungry animals. So you need to make preparations. That's what JesusPets is for. We are assembling a community of heathen pet-lovers to care for pets that are "left-behind." We are coordinating with feed mills and kennels in preparation for your post-apocalyptic pet care needs."

Someone actually SERIOUSLY wrote that. Scary, eh?

The other key to surviving summer in Arizona is...

a second air conditioner. It's 109 degrees and the temperature in my apartment is nearly 75, which I find unacceptable. Yeah, my electric bills are like $150-$170 a month in summer but I'm worth it.

The built-in air conditioner which comes with the apartment does fine until late afternoon on a hot day. It's 5 pm right now. Time to kick on that second a/c unit so the one on the roof can keep up.

The key to surviving a summer in Arizona is...

Get up VERY early in the morning and take afternoon naps. It's amazing how "cool" 88 degrees feels at 5:45AM. You can actually get things done like washing cars and other maintenance. But to go outside at this time of day to walk or something (a bit after noon)..... You've gotta be kidding.

We don't play golf here

I just finished watching a show on Link TV, which you probably get if you have DirecTV. It was a film called "We don't play golf here." Fascinating view of how the locals view globalization and really are starting to have a "fuck the rich" attitude. Having lived in Latin America and seen how 90% of the population lives compared to the small percentage who "have" - I can't blame them.

For more info check out this link to the channel's page about the show.