Just once, as big around as my arm from my elbow to my wrist.

Ok, enough doom and gloom. This one had me laughing the whole (2 minute) drive home.

I go to the supermarket daily. I've said it over and over on here - it's a habit formed living in Uruguay. Besides, it's a great way of not seeing just how much money a month I'm spending on food when its spread over 28 transactions vs. 3 or 4 :)

My local supermarket just started carrying Yakult.

The name is off-putting to the American-english speaking ear. It evokes images of some strange religion practiced by Ren and Stimpy or worse yet, it sounds vaguely Russian. Then when you pick up the bottle it says "fermented milk product."

The latina cashiers are all surprised. "I didn't know we sold that! My mom made me drink one of these every day growing up in Mexico!"

The cashier tonight asked me - "What IS this stuff? I've never seen it."

I'm trying to be diplomatic. "It's like Dan-Activ (an active culture yogurt) but cheaper and more effective. It just appeared in the store here and I always bought it when I lived in South America. I drank one every morning and then it wasn't a problem if I slipped up and drank the well water."

Yes its a cop-out but it's quicker than having the "Where is Uruguay?" conversation.

Oh my god, the responses you get... "Huh. My husband is never regular. He always tells me, JUST ONCE I'D LIKE TO PUSH ONE OUT AS BIG AROUND AS MY ARM FROM MY ELBOW TO MY WRIST all in one piece."

I started laughing and was like, "Don't take me there!"

I nodded over at the latina cashier a few lanes away and said, "Oh, it works. She knows what it is too, she was surprised to see it here and even more surprised to see a gringo buying it." (American girls don't know the proper word they really call us, which is gabacho."

I figured, I really don't want to know more about this unknown man's bowel movements.

So the woman asks me - "How long does it take to work?"

Hell, I don't know. But I answer anyway because I was hitting enter on the debit card machine and knew I'd escape shortly... "Three or four days." I'm trying to change the subject a little... "Don't let the description on the bottle put you off - where it says 'fermented milk product'. It tastes better than it sounds."

"Huh, how 'bout that. I'll have to have him try it. If I see him again I'll let you know."

"Well you have a great night - but I mean no disrespect - I'd rather not know OK? Take care..." and with that I'm the HELL out of there!